You know the feeling. The one you get when you hear or read something that simply nails it? I experienced that feeling just this week.
While planning some seasonal posts and social media I found an article that propelled me right to that place, that uncomfortable intersection of seeing change, and beginning to question everything.
The columnist’s words struck me. She was relaying a story about an Adult Child, a daughter, swimming in her pre-Thanksgiving thoughts.
“Can Mom still handle making the traditional big dinner? Is it too much, should we all pitch in? Should I merely begin to help, or is it time for me to take on hosting the big dinner myself? How could I, or would I be taking that away from Mom?”
The daughter was weighing the challenge, not only the task but wondering how much to do, how to suggest it, and how it might best be received. There is a conversation at hand. She was feeling the Tug to Talk.
When Is It Time to Talk?
Every year at this time we begin to see the advance of well-meaning online articles that prompt us to “look for changes in our seniors” as we are visiting or gathering. (We post them also). We must be open to noticing signs of change that tell us it’s time to talk.
Let me just add here that I read those articles, all of them, without fail because I consider them to be important and lifesaving information. One never knows which combinations of words could strike someone and motivate them to take action. Me, I am filling my quill.
In this case, the daughter was feeling the Tug to Talk: a big signal, horns blowing, and undeniable you-will attend-to-me thoughts. I am always glad to learn of someone’s newfound awareness, and even more glad to help people act on that Tug to Talk.
There is more to consider here. Part of me wants to exclaim “But wait! There’s more!” because there is indeed some good news here.
On the coattails of all the forthcoming articles about “what to look for as you visit over the coming holiday season” will be many helpful hints about starting the conversation.
Perhaps the words do not come easily for the senior’s loved ones. Maybe this kind of conversation seems alien or will require you to learn a new skill. Remember, as youngsters we all had to learn how to hold a big stick of wood with graphite in it and scratch that against a piece of paper, making marks that others could in turn actually decipher. Conversation and related skills are learned, too.
Relief is here, especially this time of year. Guidance to hold conversations, tips for talking, just how to answer the tug are abundantly and readily and seasonally available to you beginning NOW. Why not embrace it for yourself, or to help another? Be open to reading those articles, I bet you will begin to notice them now. Read ‘em.
Reading conversation starters empowers me. It helps me to better communicate and find new ways to educate families so they can get The Job done. The Job might be talking, really talking. Or simply listening and responding, and affording others the same privilege. It may be bringing others on board to brainstorm or coordinate. It might be one of the times to circle the wagons. Listen for and respond to the Tug To Talk.
The Job is taking action. The Job is to answer the Tug to Talk. And we can help here.
Are you feeling the Tug to Talk? Need to know where to begin or how to maximize your family time together this holiday season? NAVIGATE NC can help with conversation starters and plans of action. CONNECT WITH US or simply call us at (919) 628-4428 to schedule your Complimentary Consultation.
